I am an aspiring feminist theologian. I spent ten years of my recent past and a chunk of my childrens’ inheritance pursuing advanced degrees in theology. I have often wondered if the work I was doing towards realizing my aspiration and trying to effect change in the Roman Catholic church was big enough to matter. In reading the guidance for this week’s prompt, I came across some advice that resonated with me…is my work small enough to matter? Working full time, enjoying time with my family and friends, and engaging in a hobby or two doesn’t leave me with a lot of time to reform the Catholic church! But I can do small things in a big way. The Bible has many examples of small things making big impacts. Think of the little woven basket in Exodus 2 – which Moses’ mother used to hide him from those who wanted to drown him. Think of the boy from John 6:9. He had “5 small barley loaves and 2 small fish” that Jesus used to feed 5 thousand people. Think of what Jesus said in Matthew 17:20 – “…For truly, I say to you, if you have faith like a grain of mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move, and nothing will be impossible for you.”
I was once told by a colleague whom I had finally met in person after many years that I “sound a lot bigger on the phone” to which I replied that “it doesn’t take a lot of dynamite to make a big bang.” So I will do small things starting with returning to the practice of taking 30-60 minutes every morning before work to read from my extensive library of unread feminist theology books. Another small step I will take to resume my journey is to re-engage with FutureChurch, a step I have already taken and which led me to this workshop. The third small step I will take is to return to my custom of taking at least one annual retreat. It’s a little tough right now as we work our way through COVID but there are options.
Are these goals small enough to matter? Time will tell!